apparently my interest, or lack thereof, in ‘A’ has not changed one bit 6 years on since i began my affair with it. it is pretty discouraging, in the least, to discover that every step forward seems to expose my inadequacies and deficiencies. try as i might, i can’t seem to move away from it. perhaps my mental wall is the stumbling block to success, but somehow, i can’t help feeling that there’s more to life than just being another rat in the race of life. as someone so very aptly said, ‘we are just minions’, being ordered around and expected to obey every whim and fancy of our masters.
juxtaposing then and now, life was much simpler back then. when i was doing something i loved. i was branded an ‘idealist’. but then again, having ideals gives you so much more to live for than just being pragmatic. having ideals means hopes and dreams and the possibility of what can be and not just what could have been.
its inexplicably frustrating when you try to fit into a mould that is not your own. we were not cut the same way, not meant to conform to rules and regulations but were meant to explore and to ‘think out of the box’.
2 more years of this corporate bull and its hasta-la-vista, baby… ’nuff said.